{Subliminal Silence}
If I had a world of my own, everything would be nonsense. Nothing would be what it is, because everything would be what it isn't. And contrary-wise; what it is, it wouldn't be, and what it wouldn't be, it would. You see?
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I had no time to find a costume so I have finally found something to do with that ugly ass PINK bridesmaid dress, from a friends wedding. (It should be noted I no longer talk to her, the cold war took another).... but as soon as I smear "Blood" all over me I am as good as Carrie...Only I am going to be the HOT carrie.

At least I got something out of being in that wedding.
Wanna know what I think is funny:

At the job I quit in August, I had become pretty good friends with a married guy. This led to tons of talk and jokes in the office about an elicit affair. But no one REALLY believed the talk, because they knew I was shallow and he was from AL (which is not acceptable). So today I made the hour and a half trek back to where I used to work to go to lunch with some people. We went to a restaurant that I used to go to at least 2 times a week and when I walked in, in front of everyone that was there, the waiter looks at me a says "Hey, it is *****'s girlfriend, and he isn't even here".
So I said that we broke up, and the affair was over. Maybe the talk will stop now.
The funny part is that as much as people deny the fact that they want me, apparently everyone around them can tell. It really is hard being the girl everyone wants.

Otherwise I think I am going to a party tonight, $20 cover but then there is an open bar. And you know what we say about open bars... "WHOO HOO"

Oh and to "ANONYMOUS", I would not delete your comments if you were funny, clever or nice. Let's try a little harder, ok?


Today was apparently, "Marci is not going to think things through day"

Above a few other things that were carefully thought through, i went and got a car wash today at drive yourself thru kind. And I was punching the code in the machine and then rolled into it the car wash..... Well I did not have enough time to get my window rolled up before a huge gush of water came straight at my face. The guy in the car with me was nice enough to say "ROLL YOUR WINDOW UP" when he saw the water.... GOOD THING for him.... I might not have noticed there was water spraying at my face.


My Bozzie turned out to be so much nicer than I thought it would be. I saw him making fun of the fact that i don't ever make sense. I laugh at myself, and now you all can laugh at me too. This is how a fellow blogger (The King, if you will) views my Blog.

Marci is the winner of. the Hi, welcome to my world, where there are no rules, well, there are rules, but I forget what they are, and watch out for that tree...doh! Anyway, where was I, oh yeah the friggin midgets have stolen my underwear, again, but that's a small price to pay for being me Award.

I think that is a good description of me. It made total sense to me.

In other news, sitting in class today learning about brian trauma from a surgeon I looked down and thought "Wow I have old lady hands, bring me my Moo Moo"

BTW.. that made total sense too.
You know how sometimes you do something that you absolutely know is wrong and no matter how hard you try not to do it, you do it anyway, because in some wierd way it makes you happy? Like the first time I smoked pot. I knew it was bad but I liked it and after awhile it led to worse and worse things, but I continued. I did eventually quite but, I think things might have gotten really bad before I did. But maybe they didn't, it is weird I am a little hazy on that fact. :).....

Well the question is, are these things really THAT bad, if you are not, technically, hurting anyone?

I am with Melanie on this one. Grad school is shit. It isall about getting to know yourself so you can help others and i think it has me over thinking way too many things.
OK so while reading the comments over atthe Grand Ennui I found out that Paul has been after my bozzie all along. Little does he know that I am not striving for "Most annoying", I really want, "funniest stuff I can't understand". In that category, Paul, I hate to say it but I top you out. But ok I agree.... most annoying would be a toss up.

A few last words about the paper that tried to ruin my life. It is done, an not bad, and proofed. MY PRINTER IS OUT OF INK. Screw it , I am done stressing.... Do you think if I wrapped a bow around the computer disk it will be received better?


Words of Wisdom from Prime Time:
"That is all anyone ever asks for. We just want someone cool to hang out with til we drop dead" -gilmore girls-
(I am right there with you, screw the marriage and monogomy thing, just chill with me and make me laugh til i die, oh and maybe throw me a "bone" every now and then)
"screw me once, shame on you. Screw me twice, Shame on me" -real world-
(what if you screw me over 5-90 times, is it an even odd thing, or does it progressivly become more my fault. If it does... THE BOY, you are totally off the hook)
Today a girl I actually liked in class was walking with me and we were talking about all the freaks in the department, and she says ... "Screw all the theories, I am going to say 'I don't give a shit what your mamma did or what happened when you were 4, you need to put the crack pipe down"

I think she should be the professor.

Also, it is really hard to concentrate in class when some continues sending you sexual text messages. I did not say they were not welcome, I just said it is hard to concentrate on anything else.

Also, I have actually turned Melanie into a bigger alcoholic than she used to be. Turns out that listening to some of the things I am doing makes her want to drink. Hey Mel, when you here the newest you might need a binge.
Today is Paul's birthday and since he is egotistical and self absorbed and likes his name on other peoples blogs I have decided to appease him today. Go on over and give him birthday wishes.

To add a little spice to it, I hear he likes to be insulted!

Happy Birthday!


Dear G Love,

If you showed up tommorw morning, say around 7am and woke me up with a kiss on the cheek, I would give you some lovin. I would open my eyes just a little bit, and smile when you said "good morning sunshine". I don't think I could wait until the afternoon either. And yes, I agree, the morning light is the way to go. You could love me soft and love me sweet. But you are wrong, it is I who needs YOUR attention to get me started right.

Love, Marci

PS. If you can't make in the morning, the night works too. But i am not so soft and sweet at night, you need to know this.
My favorite part of Fear Factor is when they say "I am here to win this so my father who has never been proud of anything i have ever done will die knowing that I am a champion". And then they lose the first challenge.
WAIT, that the ONLY part I like.
My constant bitching about this paper is soon coming to a close and the mood has greatly improved. Maybe I am sad in lonely, but the reason for the crappy mood lately was definitely stress. THANK JESUS, or ALLAH, or GOD, or BUDDHA, or choose your own poison.

and I received the most feel good text message of all time today:
"I miss my Marci, I hope she hurries and finishes her work so we can start to play again"

How great is it to have your phone beat and know that someone is smiling while thinking about you? I say FANTASTIC.
Turns out I do have a friend here. Whoo Hoo!

Sing with me:

I believe in miracles
Where you from
You sexy thing
You sexy thing
I believe in miracles
Since you came along
You sexy thing

*dances off stage left*

If the check engine light and the trunk open light come on simultaneously, that means that my car is just confused right?

I checked the engine and it was running so surely my week is not trying to get worse on me.
My maintenance man has been here to fix my fridge 3 times. He is here now, and since I never get out any more and I can not talk about people in front on their faces I decided I would talk about how incompetent he is while he is here.

Why the hell can he not fix it, what does a girl have to do to get frozen food?

UPDATE: It turns ot he is the 3rd man to get his hands on my fridge so maybe he is not too incompetant. It sucks when you realize your fridge is getting more action than you.


I really do wish the TV would stop putting subliminal messages about sex and pop tarts in ever show that I watch. How am I supposed to think about anything else?
I am not sad and lonely, I am just stressed. I am not sad and lonely, I am just stressed. I am not sad and lonely, I am just stressed. I am not sad and lonely, I am just stressed. I am not sad and lonely, I am just stressed. I am not sad and lonely, I am just stressed. I am not sad and lonely, I am just stressed. I am not sad and lonely, I am just stressed. I am not sad and lonely, I am just stressed. I am not sad and lonely, I am just stressed. I am not sad and lonely, I am just stressed.

What have I done this weekend: (while I should have been doing my paper)

1. Built a fort.
2. Played in the puddles from the storm outside until some guys walked by and said "Idiot"
3. Told previously mentioned boys to "fuckoff"
4. Vacuumed
5. Cleaned the spinny thing on the vacuum
6. Laundry
7. Cleaned out the closet.
8. Cleaned out fridge
9. Danced to Barry White's "you sexy thing"
10. Discovered a new favorite artist while searching Amazon. (if you can download, check out Bob Schneider "Big Blue Sea" & "Round and Round"
11. Had conversations out loud, by myself with 2 different people that I have something to say to but can not because they are not receptive to hearing me say anything.
12. Talked to Paul, quite a bit.
13. Opened a IM window to say something to someone else and changed my mind 17 times, then closing the window.
14. Discoved that my loins yearn for Michael Ian Black, after watching 80's strick back on VH1.

There are more but I think these are the highlights. If anyone needs tips on procrastination, feel free to ask.


Tonight I have made a decision NOT to abide by day light saving time.
So when you all will be turning your clocks Back I will stay in the future. So that means if anything big happens before spring, I will be giving you all the heads up an hour in advanced.
You want to know what I think is cool and not embarrassing at all:

When I am getting my clothes out of the washer and putting them in the dryer and a man behind me takes the washer I was using and then turns around and says "um, ma'am, excuse me but I think these are yours"

This is when I turn around and see that he is holding my favorite duckie underwear and kinda smiling because he thinks it is funny that I am 24 part 2 and I wear ducky undies. What ever.... he probably had some spong bob tighty's on.



So I have another 10 page paper due next week I have not started on yet, and right now in the middle of my apartment there is a fort. Yes, A FORT. Complete with couch cushions holding up a blanket, with a "window" for the TV, and a "door" that lets out to the kitchen. It is very well constructed, if I may say so myself. It is true that I am 24 part 2 (25 in layman terms) and I seem to have gone to extremes in order to avoid doing this paper, and it is Friday night, and I am home alone building fort's, and I know that this seems pretty pathetic. BUT MAN, MY FORT IS SO KICK ASS. I hope this is not a reason no one will ever love me, because if building fort's is wrong, I don't want to be right.

Right now you are reading this thinking I am a huge idiot but I bet you secretly want to build a fort of your own. Moments like these I want a digital camera so you can see that my design would be hard to beat.

Well I have to go set up my army to protect me while I am sleeping in fort tonight.
Sometimes when I get stressed out, I pick fights. Everyone who knows me should know this, and should know to stay away from touchy subjects.

And why is it when the truth is presented to someone, they get so mad.
Also, when talking smack about someone on IM... make sure you are typing in the right window adn not actually sending it to the one youare talking about.

Has anyone seen the ice cream truck? I really want to dance to their retarded music in the street and get a rocket popsicle.


I have found a new secret boyfriend. I can't tell you who it is because then he would know he was my boyfriend and that defeats the purpose of a secret boyfriend. Now i feel dumb for hitting on his friend. But this guy took the list and answered them all and out of 81 possible points he got 69 (I swear that is the score) but he lost 3 points for owning white jeans, but he made it up by putting hot dogs in his mac'n cheese.

New friend and free beer, TODAY ROCKS MY FACE OFF!
Last night I could not sleep because I was trying so hard to think of nothing.... and then something would creep into my nothing and I would have to start over. Nothing is hard to get.

I also could not sleep due to the fact that I kept thinking I was going to get hit on the head with a snow globe (major props to someone who names the reference, hence learning way to much about my personal life)

Tonight is free beer, (not bear, although that would be cool too), There is not a problem in the world that free beer won't cure. Well except, my procrastination, and maybe the smell of public transportation.


NO ONE WAS KILLED TODAY! That was my one goal leaving this morning. However, there is a girl in the world who will not speak to me. One down 5 billion more to go, I am on my way.

Today during my presentation I got to pretend to be a client and demonstrate the "empty chair method". I took my ball of nerves and placed them in the chair and talked to them and they talked back (when I moved seats and talked for them. Here is how it went: (remember this is in front of 30 people I do not know)

Me: Hey man, why you want to bother me.
Ball of Nerves: Well, why don't you tell me why you always have to volunteer for this stuff when you know I hate it.
me: I am trying to toughen you up, jerk.
BON: well I hate you and I am going to make you vomit in front of everyone and they are going to point and laugh
Me: Bring it on! I am stronger than you.
BON: Can we try to work together.
Me: That is all I want from you.

The professional directing me says what does the ball look like. And I said "He is kinda smaller than he was" and he says why did you say it was a HE. And I said ... Um.. Did you see the trouble he was giving me, of course it was a HE.

Here is what I wanted to say:
Me: Hey if I promise you we will get laid, can we work together some how.
BON: Deal
Me: Lets go get a beer.
Remember the stupid bitch I told you all about? Well this morning I was having a pleasant dream about someone that involved me in a short skirt on a lunch break at the lake, and let's just say the dream seem so real it was as if I woke up satisfied, almost as if someone was here. So I was in a good mood and I checked my email. There in the inbox was an email from my professor that informed us our speaker called him and did not know what he was supposed to do today. The professor was a little less than happy with us. Well me and another girl have handled hand outs and the stupid bitch was to handle the speaker. Guess what? SHE DIDN'T. OK STRESS..... we know have 2 hours to figure out how to fill 2.5 hours of presentation time. Not to mention the fact that i am so embarressed that i am not sure i can face my professor.


And I hope that dream comes back agian tonight.

Oh i also think i might have propositioned a friend of a fellow blogger in his comments section and that is kinda funny.


Dear people that won't leave me the hell alone when I am trying to work,

Do you not see the pen in my hair? Everyone knows that this is Marci's "serious pose". I would appreciate if you would get the hell off my back. I do not want to answer your questions, or accept your flirting. The signs are apparent, but since you are confused by them, I will spell them out for you:

Pen in poneytail.
Horn protruding from under hair.
Surrounded by paper that I occasionally throw with force and then curse when it lands right in front of me.
Surrounded by open books.
Occasion profanity while I am sitting alone.
When I am holding the computer, while apparently trying to throw it out the window.

If these signs were not blatant enough for you, the heavy sigh and grunting should do it. BUT NO, you are a freaking idiot.

Please DIE,


I just had to turn down a free dinner at a good restaurant with a good looking, over 6 foot tall guy, because of my 2 midterms tomorrow. I AM SO OVER THIS STUDYING!
Today while talking about social norms, I was informed that I don't know what they are. AND it was the class of criers that told me this. Whatever! I am so much more normal than them:

There argument:
"Marci, you start singing out loud in the MIDDLE of class when you zone out and get bored"
"Marci, your clothes rarely match"
"Marci, You sport knee high stripe socks every day"
"Marci, you make jokes at our pain"
"Marci, you have conversations out loud with yourself when we are on the elevator with you"
"Marci, you laugh, a lot, at NOTHING"

My argument to them:
"I don't participate in group crying"

Hands down, I think I win.
Beisdes, if they did not bore me, I would talk to them in the elevator, not zone out in class. And by the way, I am not laughing at NOTHING, I am laughing at them, AND I know that by social norms I should not tell them about it when it happens.


While taking my 586th study break today, I was bored. And sometime when this happens I think it is funny to call the mother and confuse her. As goes the following conversation:

Mom: Hello
me: Hello
Mom: Hello
me: HA hi mom it's marci
mom: Oh hi
me: Mom, why does asparagus make your pee smell SO bad?
mom: Well, marci, It does not make my pee smell bad.
Me: OH
(long pause)
Me: Oh well hey mom, why does asparagus make MY pee smell SO bad.
Mom: I don't know, maybe you have a dirty STD
Mom: Oh well i hear you can find stuff like that on the internet.
Me: Ok mom i am going to go and find out what STD i have, BYE
Mom: ok, bye


I am in the best mood ever and I think today I am one step closer to understanding the mind of the "psycho Chick". I am ok with this because I realize that the things that I am about to do put me in the Psycho category and "REAL" psycho girls probably do not know when they are in the category. What am I about to do you ask?

I am on rocky ground (because I said something I should have kept to myself, but i fhe wasn't a selfish ass hole it would have been ok) with a certain someone, but I am in a good mood and it is Saturday night, and I have not done anything but stare at my computer screen, writing a paper, for days. So I want to call a certain someone and say "hey lets hang out and have fun tonight" and hope he pretends there is nothing wrong too.

Ok so i can't do it. DAMMIT!

oh well TOY STORY IS ON! This movie makes me so freaking happy whenever i see it. I guess i will sit and drink ALONE for another night.

I generally have a problem getting my mind off sex, however when I am doing research and google "Burn victim Therapy" I am trying to get work done and actually get my mind off sex, the world sends me to a porn site, and I get all side tracked.
I guess it is the oposite for those people that find me by searching :

"Lines of women humping"
"Mary Kate and Ashley"

and my new personal favorite.....

"Rent a midget in Altanta"
So about a month ago Gldn lady posted about having a hard time studying due to a song.

Well, right now I am at my computer trying to write a half decent paper and I am feeling her pain. I don't think a grad school paper can include "Shake it, Shake it, shake it, like a Polaroid picture". Who knows, maybe I can work it in there somehow. DAMN YOU OUTKAST.


Last night I realized how old I am.

I went to my free beer and had a better time than normal. Maybe it is because I have barely had human contact in 2 weeks, but my friend and I started talking to this group of people and after 3 hours they said they were going to 80's night at a club. My friend wanted to go because there was a hottie he had his eye on going. So we came back to my place to wait until 11 or 12 to go and I fell asleep. Yep, I am a party animal.
I woke up to him on the phone saying "I don't know, my partner in crime has passed out". So I woke up and said shit lets go. Just then my phone rings and it is "THE BOY". Apparently he was returning a phone call from like 2 weeks ago. So I have an ever so disturbing conversation with him and then I put a sweater on and went to the club. When we get there I am sober and not in the mood to drink and I am having a good time watching fools dance, little did I know I would soon be one of them. But everyone there was so young and they were singing to the music and I thought this was strange because they were fetuses in the 80's. So eventually a guy that has been digging on me fro a few weeks (but I told him last week I wanted no part of him) got me to dance. I was a dancing machine. And then this party animal got really tired and I came home and watched fox news til 4.

Being old sucks.


Dear lawn man,

I think you are the lowest life form that exists. As if was not bad enough that you woke me up at 8:00 am after I stayed up til 4, now you think it is really funny to mow the 3 feet of grass out the front of my apartment for 2 hours. THEN when I think I have finally gotten rid of you and I am finally able to concentrate on my work you come back with your cute little blower, and stayed for another hour blowing god knows what right outside my door. If you do not go away soon I will be forced to come out there and shove that blower up your ass. I HATE YOU AND WANT YOU OUT OF MY LIFE.
you are so lucky I am in a great mood.

Have a great day,
Tonight a boy came over and totally took my 3 big bags of trash to the dumpster 86 miles away. Now either he is really really sweet
He walked in and saw that I had been upset and stressed out and living like a pig in completely inhumane conditions and was a bit disgusted that he had to take it out so he could watch baseball without having the rancid smell wafing up his nose.

However, I think he just wanted to do something nice. I wish he would have taken care of the dishes too.

Update: While he was quietly watching sports and occasionally laughing at my bitching, but not saying anything back because he is fantasticly allowing me to do my paper, he utters the words every girl wants to hear at 2 am. "I want Taco Bell". Really tell me that this is not heavenly! Nothing like doing a paper and someone going to taco bell for you in the middle of the night. He might be my best friend.


The dumbest thing I have over-heard so far today:

"She is not a vegetarian, she is more of a nutritionist"

Now, in what world do you get those 2 mixed up? These menial people below me never stop shocking me.
What is more important when you want both:

Living the dream of helping people?


Disappearing for a year or 2 to find yourself?

Or are they both ridiculous things.

I have done something I have never in my life done. I ordered a book a few weeks ago that I though would help me figure some things out, while drunk and talking to Melanie. I stayed up til 3:30 reading last night and I think I am more confused and worried than I was before. SCREW READING BOOKS FOR REASONS. Back to my lighthearted reading.


3 things:

OWN IT! what is something about your past that you should be horrified about do you want to own? Something you did, wore, had....

My friend Kristin seems to think I have a problem owning something, so here is mine.
I wore Z. Cavarricci's. And I wore them with pride. I was about 11 or 12 and they were the HOTTEST new thing. These were the pants that were so cool in the 80's even your best friend would not let you borrow. So I begged and begged my mom and she finally said ok. I got my very own pair of purple Z. Cavarricci's. My favorite outfit at this time in my life was a bright ass pink shirt and my purple z's, accessorized with my white Ked's. And since I am OWNING it right now I will say I use hair spray and had bangs and buck teeth and big ears. I also rolled the sleeves up. When I see pictures I am truly horrified at what once was. Maybe my mom will frame the picture and send it to me soon. So Kristin, what do you want to own.

Melanie got SO busted. Please read the first paragraph and then the comments.

3rd a letter to a friend.

Dear friend,
I don't know why you are mad at me, but you were supposed to call 5 days ago, and you totally stood me up. I know you stopped taking your medication, however, I do not feel that this is a reason to make me worry about you. I know you don't like it when I get stressed out but you need to learn to deal with this constant part of my life now. If I do not hear from you by tomorrow I am going to be SO MAD at you.

Talk to you tomorrow, (or go to hell)


Hypothetically, will making "me and my baby" jokes, jinx someone in some way. An example being:

other person: I get to go have a good time tomorrow and drink a whole lot and hang out with friends

the hexed person: Oh Just Great go have fun with ALL your friends. I am just going to sit here alone with my unborn child.

Or does that not happen? Hypothetically that is.

I have a new roommate. His name is Fred. He looks something like this (melanie DONT click). He is big and strong and I have proven to be a great roommate. At first I asked him nicely to leave and held the door open for awhile, but when he showed he really wanted to stay I said ok. I allow him to have what ever part of the apartment he wants. That is right, he comes into an area and I move to another. I think Fred moved in this morning when I was leaving for school. He is not hopping around nearly as much as he was earlier. Fred might die soon. I hope the guys from the funeral home will come dispose of the body, I don't think I could bare to. Well I think Fred wants to play on the computer. Gotta run. I think I will hang out outside.
You know how sometimes your mom gives you things that no one who actually knows you would ever think of buying you. Such as: Granny Panties, socks with balls on them, a picture frame for that ever so sexy picture of you in the early 90's (which, by the way, were rough for us all) with big bangs and rolled up jean shorts.

Well today I am out of clean knee high socks, so I am forced to break into the mom drawer and find socks. So today I am breaking in the Bright Blue Harry Potter Socks that were most likely purchased for 25 cents if I know my mom. OH YEA. If someone does not hit on me today, something is wrong.
I have added a new name to the side because it seems she thinks I am this and more. I might be trying to make herthis. How ever, secretly I think she will this.

I have just been what she calls a "link whore" and you all know if it contains the word whore I HAVE to be apart of it. Any how she has made the elite few. CONGRATS.


So tomorrow I have the class where every one wants to cry all the time. This might be good for a few laughs, if I am in the mood for it tomorrow. I am supposed to be wording on my "feeling" words, and I must say I have been a little slack. After all, being an emotional hole it is hard to keep an assignment like this on the forefront of my mind. So tonight I am going to practice by telling a few people how I FEEL.

I feel angry when you are a complete ass hole, you emotionally immature piece of trash. Eat donkey shit and die.

I feel sadness when I realize you are the biggest idiot I have ever met.

I feel anxious when I think you are about to come tell me another one of your stupid ass stories.

I feel elated when I see you walk away.

I feel disgusted for you when I see that you would actually leave the house looking like that.

I feel naughty when I think about... Oh wait nevermind.

WOW, looks like I have a grasp on my feeling words, I am so ready for class tomorrow.


Today I went and got a samuch(aka: sandwich) at one of those places you order and give your name and when it is done they scream your name like you have just won an award. Well, while I was waiting for it to be ready, I struck up a conversation with what a like to call a Hottie. We chatted for a few minutes then all the sudden I hear the woman at the counter scream "Morace". Due to the fact that she was the perfect blend of Ghetto and Country, it came out pronounced MORE-ASS. She looked right at me, and the guy next to me backed up and looked at me with the "GOOD GOD YOUR NAME IS MORE ASS" look. I got all embarrassed, grabbed my samuch and ran out of the store.

Why is it that I can constantly do things that should embarrass me, but they don't then someone calls me More Ass and I fled the scene?
This is what I have done today while my paper is still not writing itself. BASTARD.
I hate you so bad
you are the "I hate you so bad" happy
bunny. You hate everyone and eveything and your
not ashamed of it.

which happy bunny are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Right now in the world there is someone that is saying, "HOLY SHIT MY NEIGHBOR IS REALLY LISTENING TO BILLY IDOL AT MAX VOLUME AND I HATE HER AND HER TASTE IN MUSIC". and that person might be my neighbor. But hey I am doing the rebel yell so can he really hate me.
If I hear about any of you buying this, consider our friendship over. I will be so embarrassed for you.


A friend who does not want to be mentioned put words of the English language together today in the most profound way. And she was able to do so without even thinking about it. I think there might be a lot I do not know about a good friend.

the phrase: "Did he spooge in her box?"

Where does she learn this stuff?
Stop what ever you are doing and go find an Einstein Brothers and get a sweetie pie cookie.

I got one yetserday and it was the best thing in the world and i don't even generally like cookies. I would go get one today if i could find the motivation to shower and eat.


So last week I challenged Karma to up bone up. I mentioned that I was not done pissing it off and it turns out I wasn't. But this time Karma Struck fast, and with much fury.

I am posting to congratulate Karma on a job well done. I look forward week after week to my free beer. This week Dogwood Said "NO". Hence I am stuck at home with nothing to do. My heart is broken.
Last night, I was all alone drinking beer and I struck up a conversation with the Best Internet Pal of All Time on AOL. We were talking and I was talking about Burger king and how I love the croissant's. Only I spelled it CROSONT. I knew this was wrong and I was a typing maniac so I figured he would know what is said. So I asked him how to spell it and he told me and then he said "you know how I know that".

At this point I was waiting for a funny story about something like him getting kicked out pf a refugee camp because he couldn't spell croissant. But, he replied with "I have it tattooed on my dick". I actually almost fell out of my chair laughing at that. Maybe it is not funny, But HOLY SHIT it is too me.

Seriously, if anyone one wants to jump in these almost nightly conversations, you should. It is really hard to think about how bad life sucks during them. Paul and I might be the 2 funniest people in the world.
Today I stopped my self from doing something I should not have done while I was already doing something I should not have been doing. Weird when moral reasoning sets in at the wierdest times.


Am I wrong in thinking that socks are worn just in case there is not a napkin when you need one?
Dear Real World,

Thank you for making me realize that studying was a big waste of time. I was able to walk in and out of the exam in 20 minutes and big home a big fat A++. It seems I am a genius.

Oh and by the way, if CT does not get hit by a bus on camera by the end of the season, I am never watching you again.



2 exams tomorrow and I have not studied. I figure if I still have not opened a book by 3 am then I will be behind schedule. Oh well I am a smart cookie, who needs to study.

COMING SOON: the I failed my midterms, because of the real world and Jessica Simpson post.
Dear woman in my class that talks like you drank whisky and smoked since you were a fetus,

I don't like you. When you try to talk to me and I open a book and start reading, that means I am not listening to you. When you follow me around Campus during breaks and I walk fast and turn when you go straight, that means I do not want your company. When I turn around and look at the sky while you are telling me about your daughter, that means "Go to hell". Contrary to the voices telling you that I am your best friend, I AM NOT. If you could please stop running to keep up with me, talking to me, and following me to MARTA and riding the train with me, I would appreciate it. Oh yea, and there is a thing called personal space, and you are often all up in mine and that could very possibly make me freak out and kill you one day, and we don't want that now, do we? So from now on just back the hell off.

Thanks a bunch, :)


If I turn up dead or missing soon, I need everyone to know that is is a creepy guy that lives 4 doors down from me that killed me. Seriously, the police will need to know. Melanie knows, but I want to tell you all in case she forgets or she thinks "THE BOY" came back fro the dead to take me with him.

Seriously, since I moved in this guy has stood in the parking lot and stared at me everytime I have left. Today it got more creepy. The stare was of the "I want to eat your children" sort, and it lasted the entire time he was walking out of his apartment to his car. He was really walking with his head facing backwards at me. So tonight I go to Kroger at 10:45 for an emergency chap stick run and as I am walking out, the mother fucker is sitting in the parking lot. WHAT THE HELL IS THIS!

SO just promise me you will not let the cops waste time interviewing people I know, when it is creepoid down the sidewalk. That is keeping me in a pit in his basment.
What is broccoli, besides little trees that I clean ranch off my plate with?
Why is this guy not my Boyfriend? SERIOUSLY!
Ok so I have kept this of the blog as long as I can do to the fact that the subject is someone that reads this. Due to that fact Rex you need to stop reading now.

Many, Many, Many moons ago I dated a boy known as Rex, for quite a few years. He was what some cheesy TV show would call my "highschool sweetheart". Not like Brenda and Dylan, but more like the stoner and the computer geek (good thing Rex is not reading). But for real, he had a calculator watch. :) Anyway, he was the my first relationship, first one my mom walked in and saw making out with me, first victim of a psycho that liked me, first one I ever snuck into my room in the middle of the night , first one that ever understood I was emotionally inept, and the first one ever to have my mom use the word "masterbate" in conversation with.
I came to college and we broke up. Since then we have been good friends. Not in the "we forward dumb email to eachother" way. I am talking we are good friends in the sense that anything big that has happened to either of us in the past 7 years has been followed by a phone call to eachother, and I know that I can call if I need a non-judgmental opinion or simply when I start missing the old Marci, and he will remind me I might still be imaginative and funny. I kinda think he feels the same way about our friendship due to the fact that he called to tell me about the proposal before it happened.

With all that said: He has been dating a girl for 5 years. He is marrying this girl in a bit more than a month. He has invited me to the wedding. Now we all know how I feel about weddings, much less marriage, however, I don't believe in religion either but I have a lot of friends that live the life and that is fine with me. Rex is happy and I am happy for him. Now thing is it might be weird that he invited me, the ex, to the wedding. But for some reason it might not be. I would love to see him and there will be a few people there I would like to see as well. Now I have also been asked to the wedding as a date. The date is no other than a grooms man, who was the best friend of Rex through highschool. He is also the same guy that has swooped in and picked up every girl Rex ever dropped. Now this is a nice guy that I had a really good time with in highschool, and he does need a date. If I am able to go to the wedding, I will have to go alone because any hope of me having a guy is a ridiculous thought. So I am unsure the proto call in this situation.

Strange part is, Rex called tonight. I told him about the friend and he laughed and said "use your own judgment". He also expressed how he is worried about conflict at the wedding and all the conflict is with the friend and other people. SO question is:
1. Do I go with the friend and while he gets too drunk, just sit there and have all the "look how FINE the ex is" take away from him?
2. Go alone, and have the "look how drunk that guy is" take away from the "The ex is so hot"?
3. Not go?

Your choice. Hurry and vote I need to answer him in a few days. I will tally and go with what you all think.
Did I mention this guy has made a comment to Rex that he would bang me at the wedding?
(PS I better get some comments)


Since no one reads the weekend post anyway, I am going talk to karma for a minute


Dear Karma,

I knew you had it out for me, but man, why are you so freaking mean about it. You seem to play the same card over and over again, and frankly I am bored with it. I would think that something like you would be way more creative going about things. You know maybe you should publicly embarrass me, like make me knock over a display at the grocery store or maybe you could make me fall down a flight of stairs on the patio at school. But every time i piss you off you gotta go and fuck with the same thing. I just need you to know, I would be so much better at your job than you. YOU ARE A BORE AND YOU PISS ME OFF.

With that said, I look forward to seeing your plans for me next. Looks like you will need to change your game plan now. I am almost positive I am not done pissing you off, so bring it on.

If you touch Bert we are going to have problems.



Just talk to my mother and here is part of the conversation:

mom: Marci, I am just not sure you are thinking this career path out. I think once you are in it, you are going to hate it.

me: Well, mom, I think I will decide that when I am quite a bit in debt and through 5 more years of my life, paralleling this career with a healthy career of prostitution to help pay my student loans. But thanks for your support.

mom: What I am saying is, that I every one I know in the psychological world is really crazy. Not like our family is crazy, I am saying CRAZY, and I am just don't think you are nuts enough.

me: Mom, this is Marci, do you know me?

Now I just thought there were unsupportive of me coming back to school, but it turns out they just don't know me at all. But this might be the nicest thing she has said to me in awhile.
Which one of you was supposed to bring me food? I am dying of staration here.

If my lazy ass has to get up and go somewhere myself I am going to be SO mad.
"Will you go steal me that puppy, PLEASE?"

Last night I had a couple people over and we were playing cards. We all went outside at one point and I heard the dog downstairs all crying and stuff. He had been crying all day and he was apparently locked in the bathroom, which is about 3x3 square feet, if that. So I look at my friend Duece, (who is the neighbor Will, but I am not allowed to utter certain words so now I call him duece), and I say
"Hey Duece everytime we are out and I see a dog I want you say that you will not steal them for me. I personally thinks this says a lot about our friendship. I think if you are not going to rescue the poor sad dog down there I am."

He says: "let me borrow your key to pop out the screen"

So he got the screen out and I got a dog for the night. The Dog made me so Happy. I think this is why so many single girls have dogs. So we played until she thought she could piss all over everything and then I asked Duece to go put her back. And the owners have no clue that their dog went to a party and came home really late. That puppy is going to make one hell of a teenager.

Moral: Duece Kicks So Much Ass.



That is all I have to say today. Ok I am going back to bed.


I just got my first new piece of furniture ever.

Seriously, besides all those people that got married early, those people who have the financial support from there parents, or the people that actually have careers at 25, have ever gotten a BRAND NEW COUCH. Ok so maybe I am the only one in the world left who is 25 and never owned new furniture. I have had 5 used couches in my life. And currently I am sitting on the floor, and have been for the 2 months I have lived in Atl. This is, however, convenient for dates. If you sit in my apartment you are most likely sitting on the bed. (bow-chick-a-wow-wow). This however, is bad for secret relationships. So today I got a cute little comfy love seat. I almost took my blanket to the store with me so I could try out my "Watching Movie position", but I didn't think it would be ok to snuggle up on every couch, much less ask them to bring me a TV. Anyway, next Thursday I will have a place to sit.

I really do miss putting my feet on furniture. DID YOU HEAR THAT MOM? I put my feet on furniture at MY house.

Tomorrow morning it is going to be 40 degrees here. Due to the fact I will have my windows open, enjoying this change in weather, I need a volunteer. For what you ask. Well, I need an extra 98.6 degrees to make the bed even more comfy tonight. I guess it is free beer night and I should be able to find it, but I have seen Identity and I know "whores don't get second chances", so I thought I would send the offer to people I kinda know, instead of relying on strangers.


A story has been asked for:

The Crying Blubbering Idiot That Never Should Have Been

I dated a guy we will call him... Paul (I swear that is an alias, hehe). Well it ended up that Paul and I and my old roommate all moved in together. We lived in a one room apt. and often had people over hanging out. Let me tell you a bit about Paul. First, I will say he tried his best. With that said, he was not working with the same FULL deck most of us work with. He often got confused as to which side of the faucet was hot, even though that is pretty universal. He is the same guy that drove a Ryder truck into the Local CVS. YES I SAID INTO. He is the same guy that would call me 20 times a day when I started a new job, that made me look good (not nearly as good as the fact I admitted to dating this guy). He would also say the dumbest things I have ever heard. Worse than "If it wasn't for that horse I would have gotten through college". In fact he never got through college. He drove piazza's. As in Dominos... and I suspect he will do this the rest of his life. You know when you open the door and that 80 year old man is there with your dinner, that will be Paul. Thing is, Paul liked me A LOT. More than normal.

so anyway, one night we had about 8 people in the apt. and as it turned out I was having a good time. Well Paul did not know some of the people and they were all good friends of mine, and I guess he was not getting the attention he wanted. He got all pouty and said he was going to bed. I was all for it because he was already acting like a pouty 3 yr old in front of my friends, and I figured I would deal with his attitude the next day. So he asked if I was coming. I said "No Paul, I am having fun and am not tired." So he goes into the room and then all the sudden the light goes out and we all hear this noise. We have no clue what it is so my friend Brad goes up to the door and says "hey Paul, what are you laughing at". Brad got this horrified look on his face and backed up from the door slowly and said in a whisper "OMG he is crying". We had thought he was laughing really hard. But no, it turned out he was whaling. Gut wrenching whaling. Like a Greek mother at a funeral. I was so mortified by this I could do nothing but laugh. Now it did not help the situation that every one followed my lead in the laughter. For the next hour we were all laughing to the point of non breathing and having to hold it in until we all got outside across the parking lot to let it out. The noise he made that night , is still so funny to me. And only the people there, and maybe the neighbors, can understand how incredibly pathetic it was.

And the only reason he was crying is because I would not go to bed at the same time he would. If I had been him I would have made up a better excuse for the display while I laid awake embarrassed as hell all night.
To this day Melanie and I still use this sound effect when we utter his name.

WHAT THE HELL WAS I DOING? Oh wait, i know the answer to that. But whoever said that is all a relationship needs was not doing it with a stupid guy.
Dear fat ass that was in my way on the escalator today and in the marta station, that caused me to miss my train because I could not scoot around your tub-o-lard ass,

I am not mad and I forgive you. After all you are gross, and going to die before me, because you are obese.

Best Regards,