{Subliminal Silence}
If I had a world of my own, everything would be nonsense. Nothing would be what it is, because everything would be what it isn't. And contrary-wise; what it is, it wouldn't be, and what it wouldn't be, it would. You see?
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I just got in trouble!!!!

Apparently I left a bad comment on a blog and the owner of said Blog actually called me to tell me not to leave mean comments. It seems my real secret boyfriend got all mad (no pun intended) at me. So i am here to say sorry, and HAPPY BIRTHDAY MADMATHIAS!!!!! Mucho love and chicken dance. HAVE A GREAT NIGHT!
Tonight I really want to hang out with Melanie and celebrate the end of it, but alas, she has OTHER friends to hang out with. So i am left with a big choice. I don't want to stay home alone, because I have work to do and that only means that I would spend all night looking for ways to avoid writing my papers, and I would end up in a prom dress with my tiara, building forts with pillows. Now this is fun and all but I am not in the mood for that tonight. So the choice is, go with Lurker Boy to a poker game even though I don't play and might have more energy than I would be able to let out at said game, OR take THE BOY up on his invitation to hang out. I am just not sure if this is ok with the new circumstances and all. i am at a loss.

Moral of the story: MELANIE NEEDS TO MOVE HOME NOW!!!!
Last night at free beer I found me a secret boyfriend for the first time in quite a few weeks. You see, Lurker boy has been going with me for awhile now, so I thought it would be wrong to scope out a secret boyfriend on his first few times there with me. Well last night, I came to the conclusion that enough time had past that I would be allowed to find me one, and besides the fact that he disappeared for about an hour (can't talk about that though, because he only wanted to get in a fight about it, and that is not cool ;)). SO I DID! Can't tell you who, but I can say it is funny to me because he is 22, and I am all about the humor of it.

Also, one of my original free beer friends told me that I would suck at my future career, and he sees people committing suicide that come to me. Now I have heard this from a lot of people that know me, but deep down I think most of them have faith that I might actually be really good at it, but S seems to think that because i am going to do substance abuse counseling and I drink too much, and that I am an emotional hole that generally doesn't care about other people, and I am to straight forward in my thoughts and might tell someone they would be better off killing themselves, and that everyone I hang out with does drugs, that I am not going to be able to do my job. JEEEZ! I think he was flirting with me.
No really, go to her site and leave her good luck comments. You see she didn't waste 3 years after her undergrad and went right on the grad school and now she is done. Only she is failing to see how cool this actually is, because she still has to defend her thesis, only the damn thing is done and there is nothing more for her to do and they are surely not going to tell her she can not graduate. But that is Melanie, she's irrational.

Melanie says:
Marci says:
you are not nervous, you just have to kill time before partying, so might as well talk about school
Melanie says:
that's totally all it is
Melanie says:
Marci says:
for real... you have time to kill and you have sat at home enough... you might as well go "socialize" with higher ups before partying
Melanie says:
totally, fuck it. i've already finished my thesis, i just have to go talk about it and the lights will be out, so i wont be able to see them, and my hair looks good, so the spotlight on me, will make me look pretty
Marci says:
oh so you can pretend it is like talking on sesame street and only muppets are listening
Melanie says:
Melanie says:
you should come, you could throw gummy bears at me while I'm up there talking
Marci says:
I would like nothing more but i would use the worms.
Melanie says:
yeah, they probably throw further. They're more streamlined.
Marci says:
and they flop better in the air... it would help take stress off, because 1, they look funny flying, and 2, you would have to jugde better how to dodge it and maybe get hit by a few
Melanie says:
damn! we should have thought of this plan weeks ago! then you could have come
Marci says:
we suck
Marci says:
if you get nervous... make cow noises, that helps me
Melanie says:
like, moooooo?
Marci says:
Melanie: ok bye



I just went and checked my mail and there is a package in the box for the Mormon state of Utah. I immediately start dancing and say (out loud to the mail woman, whom I love) "Hell yes Kristin sent me something" the mail lady looked up and gave me that "you are clinically insane, and always have more energy than I can handle, but you scare me in the 'I hope she wont hug me' type of way, so i will smile and act happy for her" look I love so much. I ran back to my apartment and opened it and it is a School house Rock CD with a post it note on it that says "I have no clue why but I had to send this to you".

Well, Kristin, I have no clue why either, but I love it. AND the best part is that it still has the bar code and Dewey decimal sticker on it from the library that she apparently stole it from. KUDOS, my friend, KUDOS!

Watch your box soon, i know you like eating soap.... and i can't tell you what i am sending, but as soon as i can find it you have. All I will say is ... Jessica Simpson, and edible. I know you are on the edge of your seat.
I just saw the Hi-C commercial I referred to so long ago... the one with the giant dildo walking around...... And I now know it really does exist, and I was actually not as shocked this time and was able to listen to the commercial too, and it turns out it is not a dildo at all, it actually IS a 6 foot tongue. I am glad I was able to clear that up, but i think maybe it is kinda dirty that when ever I see Hi-C from now on I will get slightly turned on.

Since too many people I know in real life have recently gotten the URL to this site and I think it is possible more people I know read it than ones I don't know, even though they never leave comments (NOT COOL), and since I have a bit to bitch about expel, today's post will be in the style of Sandawe Clicks, a language that I occasionally talk to myself in when I get all worked up. I have a feeling at least Belle and Mad will understand.

Last night, click click click click click and that is ok. Even though I, click click click click completely lost click click. Then click click click not smart enough for click. By the way click click clickSUCKS!, click click clickwear my tiaraclick click click click click click. click click click total ADD, click click clickscream click click click. AND.... I still didn't click click click. MAN!!! click click click Then click click click note on my door click click click You know how click click click have a way of click click click ripping eye balls out, click click click. IT IS JUST LIKE THAT!!!!!!!!!

Whew, I feel better getting that out. Anyone have advice?
A meme.. Inspired by Radmila
I want everyone who reads this to ask me 3 questions, no more no less. Ask me anything you want and I will answer it. Then, I want you to go to your journal, copy and paste this allowing your friends (including myself) to ask you anything.


It is weird that a special ring exists for 3 people on my cell phone, and just now the phone rang and it was an odd ring, and I had no clue who the hell it would have been from the ring. So I get up and grab the phone and it was THE BOY. I am utterly shocked and maybe amazed with myself that I had already forgotten what the ring meant. hmmm
It is possible I am in an incredibly strange mood, but I think i could possibly die right now if I don't get some Shrek Swirl ice cream or a suitcase full of sour patch kids, so I have something to eat while I throw doll heads at the neighbors.

That is not odd is it?
22 Questions

1. Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 18, find line 4. Write down what it says.
Maggie Estep, Soft Maniacs: "A fat lady emerged from the trailor. She was huge."

2. Stretch your left arm out as far as you can. What do you touch first?
If I was inspector gadget I would touch the microwave.

3. What is the last thing you watched on DVD? On actual TV?
DVD.. Kill bill Vol. 1 TV: a herpes commercial

4. WITHOUT LOOKING, guess what time it is.

5. Now look at the clock; what is the actual time?

6. With the exception of the computer, what can you hear?
F'n Lawn mowers outside

7. When did you last step outside? What were you doing?
an hour ago, contemplating throwing water balloons at lawn men.

8. Before you came to this website, what did you look at?
email about masturbation

9. What are you wearing?
tank top and Oscar the grouch undies

10. Did you dream last night?
yes, but this is not the right kind of blog for those details.

11. When did you last laugh?
2 minutes ago, (email about masturbation)

12. What is on the walls of the room you are in?
Books, and schedules, and more books

13. Seen anything weird lately?
kareoke, REM's End of the world done in german; and my sink with no dishes in it

14. What is the last film you saw?
Man on Fire, and I was upset that there might not ACTUALLY be a man on fire but there was, so it was a good movie.

15. If you became a multi-millionaire overnight, what would you buy first?

16. Tell me something about you that I don't know.
I tried out for cheerleading in 7th grade... OMG I AM SO EMBARRASSED

17. Do you like to dance?
YES! But only in the car, the shower, in my apartment, or in public if drunk enough

18. Imagine your first child is a girl; what do you call her?

19. Imagine your first child is a boy; what do you call him?

20. Would you ever consider living abroad?
Last night was my last group class and we all had to write something nice about one another. Is it so wrong that I couldn't think of anything nice to say about the tard so I wrote "I think it shows great strength you chose graduate school and decided to overcome you learning disabilities"?..... or does that answer just make me a bitch? I am fine with it either way.


Dear person that found this site by searching "Laura Ingle Naked",
Are you the most disgusting human being in the world? Seriously, Mary and Nellie were a lot hotter. Sorry i didn't have what you needed. I wanted to top your search and have something you might want, so I offer you this: If this is wrong I don't want to be right. (if you don't read it at least scroll and see pictures.)
Dear person that found me by searching "funny jokes for kids to recite easily",
Was that a blow to my ego, or do you really like lame jokes? Here is one your kid should be able to remeber and it is funny:

Kid: Mommy says daddy has a drinking problem, what is wrong with daddy?
Therapist: Daddy has no problem, your mommy's a bitch.
(stolen from HighNights mag)

Luv Ya,

I used to live in .. I think the appropriate word here is "SHITHOLE". I loved it! The walls were falling in and the roof leaked when ever it rained, and the electricity would go out in storms because the wiring in the walls would get so wet, it would trip the fuse, and I would have to truck through the dead carcasses of animal decay under the house to the fuse box at least once a week. There was no air conditioning, and no heat. The landlord scared me, so I rarely complained about anything. The place was the size of a Doc Martin boot shoe box. The rent was $200 a month and water was included, so being in my undergrad this was great financially.

I lived there for 2 years alone, and then on my graduation day, my best friend in the world moved in with me. His bed was seriously 4 inches from mine, and the closet was so tiny, that the truck of his car was his main closet.

It seems odd now, but our apartment was the hang out spot and we would generally have at least 5 people there on any given night, which meant there were always people walking all over our beds. I think that was the 2 years of my life that I always had tons of energy and I never stopped laughing. Ok, no thinking about it, those were the best 2 years of my life. Justin and I had the best time, even though the place was all cramped and people in the projects lived in more humane conditions, we loved it.

There were 8 apartments total, all better than Justin's and mine, but not much, and we all treated the place as a commune. There was an understanding that the 8 apartments in the house were expected to be a community and we all treated it as such. We never knocked on anyone's door. We just showed ourselves into various apartments and occasionally got to see our neighbors going at it, but no one cared, we would just get up and put our clothes on and commence hanging out. We would have cook outs together, and when the music major practice his piece we would all turn off our radios to listen to him, and there was always an odor of marijuana seeping in from the walls that would direct us to where we needed to be hanging out, we could play pranks on eachother easily, since we never locked thier doors, we had a roof we could drink on, and pee on if you are Melanie, and there was ALWAYS some one to hang out with. Melanie moved in and that is pretty much where our friendship started. Ben Hill was a magical place, and I miss it.

*insert crappy story of Justin's last chapter in the story of Marci* and I ended up moving into a house down the stairs from the original apartment. The landlord had no choice but to fix the place up and a year later, Matthew moved into the place. Matthew respected the rules of no knocking and would get come home from work every night and come into my apartment sit down and dispel all his problems to me. I got accepted to grad school and moved out a few months later and the landlord, shocked I had lasted on the property for almost 5 years, told me "this place will fall down without you".

WELL......... The place did yesterday, and I think it is the funniest thing in the world. It is the whole IF I CAN'T LIVE THERE NO ONE CAN type of thing. Apparently, melanies old apartment came crushing down into my old (now Matthews) apartment. The place did fall down with out me!


Dear Marci,

Here are some things for you to think about when your lip stops profusely bleeding.

~ You will never finish your exam if you don't turn Ani off.
~ Ani Difranco should be expelled from your collection due to who it makes you think about.
~ Apparently, karma works faster than you thought.
~ You need to pay more attention to your actions when you are deep in thought.
~ The tiny stapler might feel interesting when rubbed on your lip however, pressure should not be applied to it at this point.

~ And maybe you could do an internet search on if staples through the lip require tetnus shots.


PS you're a dumb ass.
One time in college, my roommate peed her pants in the cafeteria during dinner because of something I said........ She wasn't embarrassed because I guess everyone knew this is just kinda what she did all the time. I laughed at her. That night, I was making fun of her, and since we were being so noisy in our fun loving (fun loving=her yelling at me to shut up and me laughing at her) discussion, the entire dorm had stopped by to see what was going on. I started laughing so hard that I fell head first off the top of the bunk bed and was so injured that I could not move fast enough to the "Community Bathroom" and I then proceeded to pee my pants from a wild fit of laughter in front of everybody in the dorm.

That my friends is how I define Karma.

I am needing to remind myself of this definition, because I have a feeling me and karma might be on the outs again soon.

Tonight after hanging out with Lurker boy talking about how non-petite girls will always be fat and nasty later in life (I am 5'9" and not so petite)........... I come home and see that I have been honored on the real world blog with a photo of Drew Barrymore...... I felt better for a second until Boz threatened to put a pict of Bea Authur up in a week if I do not give him a real one.... IS THE WHOLE WORLD REALLY OUT TO GET ME?!?!

This is SO not ok, ...........from either of you!



I am not sure what to expect, but I know without a doubt that i really was just brainwashed. For some reason I was flipping channels and stopped on Georgia Public Broadcasting and there was a show on that I could not turn to the channel off of. It had to have been the devils work.

I dare you to click and then navigate away from the page immediately. If you are really daring hit the white bubble at the top of the screen. I spent 30 minutes watching them on tv and then I spend anothe hour on that site. I am not sure what they brain washed me to do, but it does seem really weird that all I want to do is glue macaroni to strangers and play with jello. No wonder kids all all kinds of screwed up today. SCREW YOU PBS!

Have I lost my mind or is the pink one the funniest thing in the world?

It is hard to play it off as one of the cool kids when you are out at a bar and you get in, what appears to be, a heated debate about articles in JAMA, empirical science of the field of Psychology, and mathematical formulas that generalize (or don't, in MY view) to the entire public. It is even harder to play it off as one of the cool kids, when the conversation gets so loud that the guy playing acoustic guitar stops mid-song to listen. This might not have been the coolest thing to do, but it is one of the best conversations I have had in the longest time.
I understand these conversations are not cool when you are drinking with other people that have no clue what you are talking about, and for that I shall be branded with the word GEEK. So if you see me walking down the street with a big red "G" on my sweater, don't think it is a gang sign and send Mad and his d.b.g. after me.


This morning I woke up and decided to re-evaluate my life, find meaning it in it all, and try to understand my purpose, work out some issues I have not had time to, but then I remembered it is Thursday and that means FREE BEER, and I think that is the only answer I needed.

This makes me so happy that I have been doing the moonwalk every time I have stood up today. Yes, you jest at my neurosis, go ahead I don't care, just don't point and yell "FREAK" like the woman in Target, that was just mean.

Neal, the boy formally known as Fiance on the blog, is in town and maybe going to free beer. He all thinks he is going to pick up a little cutie while there, I think he has forgotten how my essence paralyzes him against other girls. It has been a year since I have seen him so I understand that he has forgotten how much he pines for me.

Banana Slurpees!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



Tonight in class a group did a presentation on "Rites of Passage". One girl talked about female genitalia mutilation. She got up in front of the class and talked about how nasty it was, and it is a human rights issue and we should be in every country doing something about it.

OK, so yes, I understand it is a dirty practice, ................TO THE WESTERN WORLD and a few others. This girl is in a counseling program and the number one rule is to SUSPEND ALL JUDGMENT. One day she is going to be in an office and someone is going to say something that is foreign to her culture and she is going to screw a person up. To top it off, she is in the school counseling program and I can not wait to hear about the first law suit that is brought up against her. Yes, I would hate to have my clit cut off, and yes I would hate for someone I know to go through that, BUT that is not a ritual that the culture I was raised in practices, and respects.....So, Yes, I debated her, and yes I was alone in my opinion, and yes the entire class jumped on me, AND YES... I was right. I generally don't feel you should be a counselor with a political agenda.

A girl presented on gangs.... these words SERIOUSLY came out of her mouth:
"did you know the music you listen to has gang references? I found, while doing research, that a "shot caller" is a gang term"

I thought that this was the most disgusting display of ignorance I had ever heard... until... half the class said "NO WAY"

A totally different girl continued with gangs and said
"I was appalled to find out that to join a gang, guys are beat up, and sometimes girls have to have sex"

If you do not frequent my roomies in the Not-So Real World.... do so now.

I have published some great writing there today, and thanks to Boz, I have gotten off the school work and moved on to running dirty limericks through my head.
Every Wednesday I become thoroughly convinced that I have a different disease because I have my medical class and I normally have all the symptoms of whatever we are talking about. So far this semester I have diagnosed my self with: Dissociative Identity Disorder, Sickle Cell disease, Renal failure, substance abuse issues, anxiety and panic disorder, OCD, Social Phobia, cancer, diabetes, and Post Traumatic Stress. (I am serious about all of these things, I am seriously dying, Send money in lieu of flowers, thanks) Normally I am completely unaware I have these different problems until class starts at 4:30.

Today is a bit different. Tonight is eating disorder day and as I sit here, not able to leave the computer, I AM SO F"N HUNGRY. I want to eat everything and anything (BTW highlighters taste like ass) but, alas, Mr. Belvedere will not go grocery shopping and no one loves me enough to randomly stop by with food when I am blatantly sending hard core thought waves out to the general public, BASTARDS!

It totally becomes a disorder if I am willing to kill for food right?

During a 30 minute bitch session about our work load tonight, a girl in my class said:
"All this stress is giving me irritable bowel syndrome"

Update: Not only was I not the only one not to be done with this monster project on time, not one person was ready to turn there stuff in. WHEW! I didn't even have to show my chest.
One more thing, I think I am dying (I AM TOTALLY SERIOUS THIS TIME) so if you don't see an update soon, send David Blain to make my body disappear before anyone can see exactly how unattractive school work makes me.


Dear Professor,

I am old enough to have my priorities straight, and it looks as though you got the shaft. Sorry about this, but I will not have my stuff turned in today because I wanted beer last night, and felt that would be more condusive to my happiness than doing a write up on an AIDS patient. Sorry if you feel left out of my life because of this, but you really have been taking up a lot of my time lately, and people are going to think there is more going on with us. You really do need to lay a off a little, or maybe put out every now and then. Also, don't even think about messing with my grade, I am sure we can work something out *wink wink*

Your responsible beer princess,

I played softball again and actually managed to stay on my feet this week, and once again was one of the few people to score a run. I realized that falling actually helps me to not get grumpy while I play because I can laugh at myself instead of focusing on the fact that I am playing soft ball. I went out drinking and we ended up later in the night at a bar where we were sitting on the patio with some of Lurker Boys friends. This is when things might have gotten odd.

One of his friends told me I sell myself short. Um... If thinking I am the wittiest, smartest, most attractive person in most situations, then sure I sell myself short. Then the friends left and Dr. Phil was walking down the street and I said "Look Dr. Phil", so Lurker boy stopped him and and talked to him, and then got excited that he talked to Dr Phil. The some guy with dreds sat down and explained how he saw an angel on MARTA but before he could talk to him the angel got off the train between stops. He also talked about how he had boned a vampire before. She didn't draw blood or nothing, she apparently was so good he had to run away, but not before "they got stuck like dogs". Poor girl! I think i dreamed all of this, but maybe it did happen.

And then we went to a bar next door to take a few shots before heading home and I could be totally wrong here, I didn't think I drank all that much, but who knows, I think the word SERIOUS was used. Of course that confused me a bit because I don't generally use the word serious to describe many things, so I looked it up. Here are some definitions:

* Being of such import as to cause anxiety
* Too complex to be easily answered or solved
* Not trifling or jesting

WHOA! People actually use that to describe relationships? I am no word smith or nothing but I think that sounds bad. So in my mind significant is the new serious:
* Having or expressing a meaning; meaningful
* Having or likely to have a major effect
* Deserving to be considered; important



I understand:
Your one hour photo machine is broken, and even though I need these pictures for my report by tomorrow and I need them before I can actually do my write up on them and this makes it really hard for me to make deadlines, your day might actually suck worse than mine because I saw how many photo packets you had back there and that is probably equal to the number of people that are going to get all pissed off at you because you choose to not go to school and you work a job that requires minimal education.

I find it hard to accept:
That the damn machine has been broken ALL DAY and you did not tell me this when I handed you my pictures 4 HOURS AGO, when I could have made the decision to take then to another crappy store that has more reliable equipment, and more informative staff.

I just did something I am TOTALLY AGAINST and I can not tell if I feel dirty or completely empowered. I need to get drug pricing for 15 different AIDS medications and I can not find out how to get them. I went to Kroger to finish up what I had to do there and then I went over to the middle aged man at the pharmacy and asked him if he knew a good resource for me to find average pricing. Now I am a psychology student and a female, so I am trained in the art of manipulation, and what I was really wanting was for him to give me the prices. He acted all annoyed and said he could think of no place for me to find it. I sensed he was going to brush me off in the next 10 seconds so, since I wear my purse diagonally on my shoulder, I kinda, maybe pulled my purse so it accentuated my chest and I gently touched his hand while he was looking at the drugs i needed prices for and I gave him a pretty decent "Marci look", and he looked at me and grabbed the paper and said "give me 10 minutes and I will give you our prices."

~I understand that I don't know Mr. Belvedere, but I find it hard to accept that he still doesn't come by to clean my place.
~I understand that certain people need to get go home because they have to get up early, but I find it hard to accept that I never get booty.
~I understand E.T. had to go home, but i find it hard to accept that in doing so he ruined my life.
~I understand I have to do stuff to prove I can, but i find it hard to accept GSU won't just hand me a Doctorate.
~I understand jealousy happens, but i find it hard to accept it turns people into total ass holes that forget how to relate to friends.
~I understand gravity is always in effect, but I find it hard to accept that I can't always defy it.
~I understand I am talking about slavery, but I find it hard to accept that a midget still doesn't want to come live with me.
~I understand that Melanie lives in New York and Brad lives in Alaska, but i find it hard to accept that they don't ever want to hang out with me anymore.
~I understand that I am supposed to know a bunch of stuff, but I find it hard to accept that i am expected to be graded on it when I have been faking the knowledge.
~I understand some people think Bill Gates is going to share his fortune, but I find it hard to accept that you would include me on this asinine email list of your junk mail.


Around New Years we exchanged phone numbers because we thought maybe a drunk phone call from a stranger might have been a good way to ring in the year. Well, we never called one another...Until..... Friday night I was in bed and the phone rings. I didn't know the number and answered it. I was all like: "who the hell is this", and he says, "1 guess... I am your secret boyfriend". I think we maybe talked for 30 minutes or so and I also got passed around to his roommate and his "real-life" girlfriend. The strange part is he sounds EXACTLY like i thought he would. OH YEA, He totally wants me! The real world house will be heating up by the end of the week.
I also saw Kill Bill Vol 1&2 this weekend. I enjoyed the nice tale of light hearted domestic violence.



I just went to Kroger to get something to make me feel better, since i have sinus. While I was there I was struck with the best idea for the 100 page monster. I walked over and found the manager and asked permission to show up and do my job analysis there. I will not bore you with the details of how incredibly cool this is, since I tried to tell someone and they got lost in the first sentance and told me to shut up, but maybe that had more to do with the fact that he offered me a "good 6 inches" and i asked where he was going to come up with the extra 2, but i digress.

Moral of the story is, KROGER ROCKS MY FACE OFF, not only am i feeling a little bit better sinusly but 6% of my stress was just relieved.



After my group presentation last night, I decided if I went home I would be totally unproductive anyway, so I asked the guy in the group if he wanted to go get a beer. Lurker Boy happened to be out at the Local too, so we met up. While we were sitting there drinking, the guy from class was talking about how he hasn't been laid in awhile, and he looks at Lurker Boy and I and says:

"Seriously, when was the last time you had GOOD sex?"

Good thing I have no shame, since it was inevitable the 30 seconds of uncomfortable silence and eye darting was bound to fall on me for an answer. But I did hold back from asking him to define "good", and I also realized that "Oh before class today, a trucker named Bubba" was a bad answer too. My self control amazes me sometimes.



Today I went and picked up the medical records on my client and after looking over them I am a bit confused. The guy lied to me a bunch more than I thought he did. He left out the fact that he was currently treating 4 different STDs. Now my confusion is in summarizing these records. Do you think it would be ok for me to just type the word EW! on a sheet of paper and call it a summary?

Ok so it has been stated that I am not the best student in the world, yet somehow I sport a 4.0. Times might be changing. I don't believe in calendars, organizers, or anything that should help me keep things organized. I do believe in huge stacks of paper, and books randomly placed all over the apartment. I like my life to be in chaos. It is exciting knowing that one day this policy is going to kick my ass. Today was that day.

I was all thinking I was on top of everything, trucking along at a good procrastination rate, when I get the end all emails with a date on it. The date that my huge semester long project is due. The date is next Tuesday. I have not started the 100 page monster yet. This only interferes with the other 6 papers due next week and the 2 group presentations. Now maybe I am being over dramatic here... ButHOLY GOOD GOD, WHAT THE HELL!!!!!!! This is totally doable RIGHT?!?!??!?!?!
After I realize all this, I go to group class, where I just can not take the retard anymore and when she starts talking about something so stupid thinking we are going to interested in it, I could not help myself and i started laughing. Hard. Out loud. Complete with snorting action. Maybe some drool. I completely blame the one guy in the group because if he had not looked at me like he wanted to kill himself as soon as she opened her mouth I would have been able to control it. I say I am sorry to the group and that I am just "not there today" and something in my head made me laugh. Discussion moves on and 5 minutes later the group leader looks at the Tard and says "*Tard*, did you feel marci was laughing at you, because i think we all did". YOU BITCH!! She knew damn well I was laughing at her, why the need to revisit it.

This is when the tard announced that she was, in fact, not offended becuase she thinks I am ADD anyway.


Dear Brad,
I would have rather taken your raging alcoholism than your friends. Try to hook me up a little better next time, k?
Love, Marci

I think Brad put a curse on me. He knows that there are certain people I do not like to see, and he made me see one while he was in town and now that he is gone, I am getting emails and phone calls from the other group of people i don't care to see. I only wish he was still in town so he could go to the little shin-dig with me this friday.

I think Lurker Boy is trying to kill me. I feel yucky and it is all his fault. He will say that it is my fault for thinking that part of softball was to play dead between bases, but I think maybe he was there and shoved me down. I hate to accept the fact that i can't run, and since I went face first into the ground, it doesn't seem like something I could have done on my own. So my leg doesn't want to move today. My arms are all bruised up and sore, that would be his fault too. My homework is just barely squeezing in on the deadline. That is his fault too. AND ... to top all that off, i think i might be getting sick and I am going ahead and blaming him for this too.

I really think he is trying to kill me, it is a good thing i kinda like the boy.


I just got a phone call from THE BOY. Now I had already closed the chapter on him, but I am not all that sure I had actually closed the book, and he called to say he was moving, for good, in 2 weeks. *cue smack sound as book closes*

I see Melanie on line and decide to tell her:
Marci says:
he is moving to **** in 2 weeks he got a job up there with a grass roots org
Melanie says:
wow, are you pauvre?
Marci says:
not too much... i said congrats and that was it.... i was done with the situation anyways, but now i am a bit upset that i might die alone. It is a bit upsetting that no one will ever love me again but I'll live
Melanie says:
we'll at least have each other, big perms, and blue hair.
Marci says:
and mu mus, can't forget the mu mu's
Melanie says:
sweet, i want a floral print one
Marci says:
cool, i call polka dots
Melanie says:
you can still wear your docs and I'll still wear my flowered flip flops. We'll be the total talks of the town.

Melanie knows just what to say, although I was going to pretend I was not upset about this, but it is a bit harder to pretend i am not upset about dying alone in a polka dotted mu mu with a perm. At least I will still be sporting the Doc's.
My comments have been lacking lately, it is almost like my blog circle forgot about me, or simply just doesn't find me interesting anymore.... but i am too busy to do anything about it. So maybe if you all leave a post that you are interested in, we will all be happy.



I thought I was too busy to post this weekend but as it turns out I found info that I think the world should know about. While reading through the DSM-IV trying to do my research I have found that:

Premature ejaculation is listed under "mental disorder".

I suddenly don't feel so shallow. I can now say I have dumped guys for being crazy and that sounds better.


Weird things have been happening lately, and I can't explain any of them and they are making me look EVEN more crazy to the people that know me. I.e. the other day Brad and I got in my car and Bert wigged out and all his lights came on and flashed 3 times. I was all "WHOA BRAD WHAT WAS THAT" and he said "um I didn't see anything Marci". Then he proceeded to tell me i was crazy.

Well I just sat down to check my email and all the sudden the computer started talking to me. I sent an IM to make sure there were still other people on earth and I was not the recipient of the 7th sign.

subliminalsilenc: is it normal for your computer to start talking to you
subliminalsilenc: mine just told me to type
Drew: type what?
subliminalsilenc: it said "what do you want me to say, type anything you want"
Drew: no, not so normal
Drew: is it still talking?
subliminalsilenc: bitch keeps repeating the same thing

Now the part that freaks me out is not that every one is going to think I am crazy and not believe me, the thing I am weirded out about is that my computer is named Klouse. Yea that's right, he is a BOY, and the voice was female. Is it possible a robotic woman is holding Klouse captive and I have to figure out how to get in to save him? Of course Klouse might just be messing with me, he is a jokester, but I will be so pissed off if Klouse went and got a surgery while I was at lunch.
I might have a new online crush..... Check out the movie trailer link on the right.
I got in trouble!!!
Brad called last night, and I missed the call until he called back around 12 all freaked out and mad at me. You can read his side over at his portion of the internet. I would like to say a big fat SORRY, and also let the world know that he is by far the most respectable Married Guy that I know. I don't know too many married people in their 20's that turn stuff down when it is thrown at them. Yep, that is my friend Brad, "he's good people".

Only the best part of the story is when I said "well, shit Brad just don't invite her to free beer". his reply, "oops, but you'll be there so I'll be ok".

In my defense though, I was having quite the screwed up night as well. I always think it is weird how people that don't know me all that well want to pour their souls out to me. And Lurker boy was all convinced a friend I brought out with me from class had the hots for me, and somehow he was the only one at the table that didn't believe the guy was gay. If only I was that powerful, I would be turning every gay guy back to straight. There is a good crop of guys that went to the other side. Anyway, Someone needs a gaydar tuneup.


Tuesday fun fact about Marci
Madmathias just reminded me of a memory I have while playing senseless games in email and I thought I would offer up a "Tuesday fun fact about Marci".

When I was little and I thought life sucked, I would go sneak Mrs. Butterworth out of the kitchen and take her to my closet and talk to her about all my problems. She helped me through a lot of stuff. I think my main problem I shared with her was the fact that I kept getting in trouble for taking food to my room. My mom tried to act like she couldn't hear Mrs. Butterworth and I guess she thought I was forming a cult of syrup in my closet or something. I got in trouble for that a lot. Parents just don't understand.

Maybe Mrs. Butterworth would be a good companion for Archibald. If he ever turned evil, I know that woman would get my back. We tight, yo.

I have not finished a paper that is due tonight because i have tried to focus on my 2.5 hour presentation that is at 4:30. I was getting a bit stressed and MSN pops up and tells me I have an email from the professor of my second class. It said:


Could I be happier right now.... Um NO.... and to top off the fact that i get to jam out to reel big fish right now instead of stressing a paper, I also don't have to go to class tonight. My weekend officially starts at 7:00 tonight.

If you are rushing to finish something now, just go ahead and stop, it will all work out. Whose drinking a beer with me tonight?

Can someone explain to me how exactly it is that I have now become the Vice President of the Rehab Student Association? I am not sure how this all came about, seeing as though I am not a joiner and I hate being involved. Somehow the director of the department thought I would be good for the job and nominated me and then BOOM there is my name in the e-mail. When will people realize that I fake intelligence, i fake interest, and i fake the fact that i actually care about what goes on around me? Hell, I don't even like people. You would think in a psychology program they would pick up on the fact that i am a farce, but no. Maybe I should be an actor instead.

The one good thing to come out of this...... I will be spending more time communicating with the professor i have a secret dirty crush on, he is married and like 55 or so, and i guess there is that whole gaining contacts and resume thing, but I had planned to lie on the resume anyway, so that doesn't count as a plus.

This rehab job better not get in the way of my alcoholism.

I have been having the most screwed up dreams lately and they are not the Laura Ingle in fraggle rock getting eaten by doozer kinda dreams, or a married guy chasing me on a horse and pushing me down a well, baby Jessica style. These are the real ones where it is almost like I am up doing stuff while i think i am asleep. I actually think some of these dreams might have happened I am just all confused about where the line of reality is after 2am, and lately I have really been enjoying them. I guess since my TV still doesn't work (aka I have not bought batteries for remote yet) it has become my entertainment and made it easy to go to sleep, since, you know, that is all i get to do in my bed anymore. Only tonight I laid down and tried to go to sleep and my neighbor is apparently building his secret ship to heaven. (i thought he was breeding elephants AGAIN, but that just doesn't make any sense). It seems that this process is even louder than when he sings gospel on Sundays at tops of his lungs. Either he needs to get done with this construction project or the Rapture needs to come tonight, because surely they would take him and I would be left to have my ever so entertaining slumber.


I just found out I was supposed to go to a Braves game tonight, and seeing as though I have never actually been to a baseball game I really want to go, only I have the Nazi class tonight that I am kicked out of if I miss it once. So I don't get to go!

MAYBE, if I had known about it earlier I could have faked a death or a life threatening disease, not that I am good at over-reacting to disease or anything, but maybe I could have sent an email and gotten excused, but NO Lurker boy tells me as I am on my way to class. Way to time it man! There better at least be a good fight in group tonight to warrant me missing out on fun with non-tarded people.

I guess since his life is more exciting than mine he can do a guest post tomorrow and tell everyone all the fun I missed out on because I am a slave to the high learning institution.

to top that, the person that used to keep me entertained texting me all through class, now decided he hates me. So I have to actually sit and listen now and I might be even more upset about this.

I really miss my college days, and last night I hung out with a college group and it feels so good to be incredibly comfortable with a group of people again. I get a certain boost of energy I haven't had in awhile. Here is what I learned......... Chris has 13 notches on his bed post, yep that would be one for each state of the confederacy (he is maybe a bit TOO southern) and he has never been to a porn store (poor guy), and he think Bush is justified in tagging homeless people (silly republican), and i learned Steven farts while at the urinal and gets compliments from guy wearing Harley jackets. And since Brad is married and Chris is engaged, that leads for a nice Q&A on the subject. I will leave that subject alone in case there are certain girls who read here.

And Also Brad actually used the words "not Mr right but Mr right now" the other night and I kinda thought maybe Brad was turning gay on me, but last night he asked how big of an ass he had made out of himself so i am going to go on pretending that comment was made after the alcohol level was heightened.

I finally got home before 3-4 am and I still didn't go to sleep until 3. I might need to meet some non-alcoholic friends so that I can start balancing this out. I would say no more until Thursday but I hate being proven wrong.


(or at least get them to be your servant)

Since we should all know that Charlie Chaplin is alive and well in peripheral vision, I need to report that he is a lazy som' a b*tch. He showed up again today and i said "hey man how about grabbing those books over there and filling out the paperwork on my client". Since he is always lurking beside me somewhere, I figured he was there when I met with the client and would be more than able to do the suggested task. BUT NO! Charlie just dipped out for awhile and offered to do nothing for me. He probably went and played in the land of the midgets for the afternoon just to spite me. He did return and I would ask him where he went..... IF we were talking.

He could have at least brought me food back. But no, he just came back and sat down and is watching a baby story just to piss me off.

Things I have done instead of tons of school work lately:
~ Went to Atlanta's Dogwood Festival and saw dogs catch Frisbees
~ Saw Hell Boy
~ Laid on the couch (a lot)
~ Hung out with Brad
~ Drank (a lot)
~ got bored and did somersaults off said couch
~ Got thrown out of the road onto the sidewalk because SOMEONE took the List too literally.
~ Got beat up. (I think those are knuckle shaped bruises)
~ Slept
~ Worked on perfecting my Moon Walk.
~ Made some drunk phone calls to Melanie and had her remind me the next day how really bad a certain situation got.
~ Almost called an old friend to apologize about what happened on the phone in my dream.
~ Spoke with Brad about plans for world domination
~ Bitched about how much work I have to do.
~ Got mad at Archibald for not doing my laundry this weekend.
~ Spent way too much time blogging when I should be writting papers and calling doctor's offices.



Melanie has this thing that I take pride in making fun of. You see sometimes she puts in her earphones on her IPOD and starts dancing and then she informs me that Kelly Clarkston is her best friend, and then she jams out with Kelly for a few hours minutes. Well, tonight I get an IM from her that say:

Melanie says:
dude, can you download the chicken dance and send it to me? i feel like a dancin'.

I immediately judged, and shook my head like she could see my disappointment, and then I started downloading it for her and listened to make sure it was an ok version and then something happened. I can not be blamed, for i left my body and something else took over. But all the sudden I was floating around the ceiling and i was watching my body do the chicken dance. How freaking weird, that the first time I smiled all day was because of the Chicken Dance. Hey, what ever makes you happy right?

Just be aware that when you wonder what people are doing at a certain moment, if you are thinking about melanie or me, just move to the next thought, because you prob don't want to know.
Once upon a time at free beer, my friend Duece hit on a girl. When she said "WHY WON'T YOU LEAVE ME ALONE!" I realized that the girl was pretty cool. A few weeks later we discovered that we were both blogging geeks and exchanged sites. Her name is Beaman, check out her fotolog.
Off her site I found another site I have been reading for awhile now and ended up meeting him last night. We will call him the Mailman, (no Belle not yours)... Anyway while drinking free beer, I asked him to draw me a pretty picture, and he whipped out a pad and pen and started drawing. Here is the outcome.

I don't know about you but anyone who can notice I am in fact a fine piece of ass immediately, is ace in my book, even if he has issues spelling my name when I am sitting there saying "M-A-R-C-I".

Then we reach the point in the evening when everyone has left and I am sitting in the grass with Lurker boy and 22 year old boy. For some reason at this point they both use the words "why don't you join us?". Was this a way to prove they were cool, or just simply a way to give me a heart attack, who knows.

Then we reach the point in the evening that I am still trying to understand. Free beer has a way of getting you to the point where you have no clue if information is REALLY BAD or just fine. Without free beer I like to think the line is pretty distinct between the 2. Somehow, I never think anything is bad while drinking, but the reaction that was thrown my way kinda told a different story. It also doesn't help when you go to sleep an have vivid dreams about it and stay confused about what actually happened becuse the dreams seem like reality too. I guess there is a possibility that it could have been the car bomb as well, in which case I am allowed to blame drew for my own deliquency again.

Ah free beer, you try and try to ruin things but I still love you!



I am getting stood up all over the place for free beer tonight. Every time the phone rings...someone else is giving up a good time, it is like angels and bells only we are talking good stuff here. Apparently, there are some people out there that are TOTALLY confused....Not ONLY can you drink FREE, but you get to hang out with me too. One, if not both of those, should sound appealing. I might have to wait until next week to start my Revolution, that way I know the Eskimo will get my back. Yea, that's right..... Brad will be here Sunday, he TOTALLY has issues staying away from me for too long.

Grant, if you are lurking around here, and you are going tonight, come find me so i don't have to be by myself too long.

It really sucks to get up early on free beer day and go to an interview in a run down state run building and meet with a total monotone authoritarian about what he is going to expect from you, and to be grilled on everything you know. He was the kind of man that was intimidating because you can look at him and tell he is way smarter than most people and is judging you on your smarts, and shows no emotion on his face.

What doesn't suck, is when it is over and he walks you out and you have no clue how it went and he says "You have really impressed me and if you take the position I am offering, in a year we are approved to hire a CRC (certified rehab counselor) and if your performance impresses me as much as I think it will, you will be able to walk into that position when you graduate."

What can you say to that except, "it ain't no thing, yo. Fo' Shizzle" and then I gave him daps.

You all only wish you were me, because there is not one thing wrong in my world right now.