I hit up some of my old blogmates last night. After convincing them it was me because every word was misspelled they tried to talk me into moving back in and told them I might consider coming back once I got might corner of the interweb comfy again, but man these people are pushy. Apparently I have already moved back in, and they have already hung my family photos on the wall. Looks like they are not taking no for an answer, So when I feel like I am cleaver enough to start posting there again I will, so start reading.
TO NIGERIA AND BACK
* Disclaimer: "Crazies" is a term meant with much love so please don't fire me.
I will not promise I am back just yet... Because if I did that, I would not be thoroughly convinced that it wasn't the wine talking. I will however fill you in on some updates.
I stopped blogging when I got a job in Nigeria.. (*women are not allowed to use computers there). well not so much Nigeria as the east side of Atlanta where I they hired me because I brought a bowl of water and washed the mans feet for the interview and he hired me thinking that I was subservient.... HAHHAHAHAH. Anyway,
that was a dare gone wrong
that put me in a funk for quite some time. It is amazing how some Nigerian man and his family can suck the humor right out of you. I thought it would be ok since I was still working with my homeless addicts but it was a detox center and as it turns out..... I like my addicts clean. Who knew?
So when they killed the goat for the Christmas party.... (I SWEAR TO GOD I AM NOT LYING ABOUT THIS... I AM NOT FUNNY ENOUGH TO MAKE SOMETHING LIKE THAT UP) I decided I would have to either get a new job or or check myself in.
I got a new job. And when the day came to walk in and throw around the "I QUIT" bat.... I got totally hosed. I had it all planned out how I was going to grab the goat and run and scream "I quit and the white man rules" but as it turns out an addict heard me telling a coworker that it was the day to save the goat and while we were doing rounds on the guy he got up to leave and he says "oh and congratulations on your new job".... I thought I was about to be beat but I still had some grateful addicts on my side....... Is it strange the only ones in life who have tried to get my back when I needed it are my addicts?
I work for the state now and I run program for schizophrenics. I don't know what is funnier, the fact that I am in management or the fact I work with schizophrenics. On my second day there the cute crazies stole the van and almost wrecked it into the ditch. On my third day I found out that one of them is totally friends with Al Pacino and some times he goes to see all and he finds the "magical green flute". And then there is the woman who thinks that if she goes to the doctor he will suck her blood out and sell it on the street (ok that one might be true). I swear to god the only thing I am missing in my daily life is an Indian and a water fountain
. It is a great gig... But I really miss my addicts so I occasionally go sleep on the street and wait for one of them to sell me crack so I can hang with them again. I think it is possible I like the drug addicts better but I fit in with the crazies better, which is a hard pill to swallow.