CORRECTION
I just saw the Hi-C commercial I referred to so long ago... the one with the giant dildo walking around...... And I now know it really does exist, and I was actually not as shocked this time and was able to listen to the commercial too, and it turns out it is not a dildo at all, it actually IS a 6 foot tongue. I am glad I was able to clear that up, but i think maybe it is kinda dirty that when ever I see Hi-C from now on I will get slightly turned on.